I'm not joking, I think I'm going to need new hips by the time I'm 30. (And for those of you who would love to make some smart perverse comment regarding that...just keep your traps shut.)
Seriously, sometimes I will just be walking, and all of a sudden I hear this deep "thunk" sound...which would be the sound of my HIP CRACKING. It sounds sort of like that noise you hear when people pop their necks, but it's a deeper sound....and boy, I CAN SURE AS HELL FEEL IT.
It's probably a byproduct of being tall, sleeping awkwardly, and riding horses for the past twenty years. Oh well...they make good fake hips these days, don't they?
And if not, then I'll just have to find myself a kickass cane. Check out some of these:
This one secretly conceals a 1 fluid oz double shot volume of liquor within the body of the hollow beech wood cane:
Or I could have a cane for every outfit:
Let's face it....one of these days I'm going to be this lady, except I'll probably have a walker in tow by that point in time:
Until then, I will just have to keep stretching and cracking I suppose. Good thing I'm still hitting up the hot yoga.
Song of the day: "One" Yeasayer (the only band that I wanted to see at Capitol Hill Block Party this weekend, so I didn't end up getting tix...still want to see these guys though!)
No comments:
Post a Comment